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  • Dec. 23rd, 2009 at 9:57 PM
me

Guess what?
You've got it
IM BACK!!!!!

Aug. 6th, 2008

  • 3:44 PM
me

 Room 614

Words were exchanged, silently as possible, as if we couldnt hear them anyways. Their resoultion was to keep us in room "614" , "for our safety" What safety?
The room was small with a window but the breeze didn't help the tension in the room. the tension between two girls... were looks of pure hate.
---- Nikki pov ---

"Its her", she sobbed, pointing at me,"shes the reason mom and dad are ALWAYS fighting". she choked a on another wave of tears, before placing her head in her hands.

A young woman patted her back , shot me a sympathetic look before sitting next to my sister. She seemed to ponder the situation before slipping out of the room and whispering something along the lines of "it must be hard" before walking away.

"Good She's gone," I muttered pulling my ear from up against the door. Now for the escape I thought..( step one - distract bitch...I mean Britany while getting a chair under the window. and two...well escape out the open window)

"What the hell do you think you're doing," she hissed, before giving me a "i-know-that-look-even-if-i-actually-dont" look.

"Nothing that concerns YOU, Brit-ney,"saying that name was enough to make anyone puke."Look Brit," I said," I had nothing to do with what happened to them."

"Oh great story, Nikki," she snapped, hatred in her eyes.

 SKREEEK
  "yes," I hissed as I reached  for the window ledge ,attempting to push myself up,pushing off the bars on the lower part  of the window.I wiggled myself thru and touched my toes on the fire escape. For once I felt like laughing but i just kept going,and going.
As I slid down the escapes,all I heard was,"Youre a fucking murder, nikki and you know it." her screaches turned to sobs and all felt was the night air.


Yea umm i think its crappy, so i might re- write it -xoxonikki

 

Aug. 3rd, 2008

  • 9:45 PM
me

It Will Never Happen to Me

 So, Most people would think I hate the life I lead unless I'm completely psychotic or something. And in some perspectives they, whom ever they may be, are correct and incorrect. Losing my loves, dreams and a chance at life; that would seem like reason enough.
  
   I should tell you murder is like... Well, it begins to become essential; a poison. Then you might ask, why not pick a better poison? But no, When you feel the wind in your hair and the adrenaline rushing through you; the things I do might seem horrible, but those things keep me going just like the dreams you still chase. 

      Just like bubbles, Dreams burst in the air when they're "oh so close", Touchable. Now is where you can laugh and say shit like this will NEVER happen to me. 

Don't lie to yourself. If my life can crash in a moment, how does yours have any exceptions?
_____________________________________________________________


   Sirens flashed outside the Taylor residence as men surrounded the house with caution tape. neighbors were gathering by the moment muttering among themselves, pointing at the covered bodies being loaded into an ambulance and staring at the girl crying on the steps.

Comments are love - Nikki

Aug. 3rd, 2008

  • 5:50 PM
me

Not a Legend

 "Nikki Angel," he whispered, looking at me with unease; as if the name was poison.

"Who is she," i asked, staring into his large brown eyes. I loved his eyes; simply because they hold something i never will.

"She's well... a mystery," he said, pausing and pulling me closer, as if to protect me from an unseen force. "Nikki Angel is a legend almost," he whispered, but suddenly stopping as if he were a child who just told a secret he was supposed to keep.

"why is she such a legend?"

His eyes locked with mine as he cupped my face."because shes killed so many," he muttered, gently pushing our foreheads together," and has never been caught, she's never left a trace". his reply had been quiet, muffled into my neck.

Click

" i guess i only loved you for your eyes, Mitch; their innocence," i hissed. i felt his breathing hitch as the cold metal pressed up against his skin. " and i should let you know that ... I'm no legend".

His eyes brimmed with a look i'd never seen from him, and...

Bang

... one that will never be seen by anyone else.

 



Comments are the secks... LOVE YALL - nikki

The letter O

  • Jun. 14th, 2008 at 2:27 PM
me

so i got this from everstone
cause it looked like fun

1. Reply to this post and I'll assign you a letter.
2. List (and upload, if you feel like it) 5 songs that start with that letter.
3. Post them to your journal with these instructions
  

Five with the letter O:
1.Out Here All Night - Damone
2. Our Lady of Sorrows - My Chemical Romance
3.Over Exposed Photo - so they say
4.One for the Road- Funeral for a Friend
5. On It - Mindless Self Indulgence

Wheee! that was fun. now i gots to go pack for camp
-xoxo nikki

Jun. 11th, 2008

  • 9:34 AM
me

 Skin

So what
If i live in my skin,
What I'm comfortable in.
How i move, how I breathe
Can't you love me for me

I can choose for myself
even if my decisions arent the best
Can't you atleast pretend,
'cause i'm pleased with who i am.
Like red M&Ms,
I like who i've grown to be
To every last drop of blood in my veins, My individuality
Can i call it my own, call it me

You don"t seem to think its ok,
the want to be different from my brother, sister or childhood playmate
Unbelievable....
a little bit wild, crazy... an individual
Does anyone believe its fair
Just to be Me

Jun. 8th, 2008

  • 9:17 PM
me

 Every word that i speak

Every word that I speak
Every note from my mouth
Mostly the truth, not always right.
I might be called on the things I say
singled out, but I'm never truly alone
because if I was the only one to establish my thoughts, dreams and ideas
We would have no one
Who tried to do anything,
Make a bold and wild move
To chase their dreams...
and if you dislike these words that mean so many things
Think about those who supported your dreams and ideas
Before you start to think twice about the words that we speak.

-should i continue?
    - nikki

Mar. 9th, 2008

  • 6:59 PM
me

A Diary in Red
Previous chapres:
Who Cares if I Cry, When I’ve Lost All That I Love?

 


Medical tears

          Bodies were scattered thickly along the beach, salty water red with war and bitterness. Few were brave enough to walk among the fallen, to say goodbye to those who were never going home. I walked through them, saying a silent prayer for each soul, each brother he met along the way. Watching them come and go; Friends, Brothers, and people so dear; Trusting and hoping, drenched in innocent blood. This cross on my arm makes me an angel and the hope of life in the mind of so many, but what I’ve seen and done makes me no angel. When I’m out there amidst the dying, the fighting and the gunfire, why do I feel so helpless?

 

- basically this is supposed to happen right after "who cares if i cry" and is the view of a medic

Mar. 9th, 2008

  • 1:55 PM
me
 

A Diary in Red

Who Cares if I Cry, When I’ve Lost All That I Love?

                The sound of gunfire had been raging on for hours if not days between the long body-filled beach and the enemy, but the boys were used to this now, fighting at no end till no one was left standing. A few medics ran like mice between the bodies and helping who they could.

        “BOOOOM” wood splinters flew everywhere as a bullet hit the small structure, reducing it to nothing more than woodchips. Mikey ran like the other men that were hidden behind the driftwood, avoiding the bullets flying through the beach. He was bleeding from a wound to his leg, but he didn’t care he just had to…

        Mikey’s vision began to fail before he slumped onto the cold beach, lying motionless, his breath slowing. A medic was pressing gauze to the wound, cursing but Mikey’s eyes had began to flutter eyelashes finding a resting place on his cheekbones and his chest no longer rose and fell like it should.

        Another man ran down the beach, jumping over bodies, chilled to the bone. He was there for his country like most others but mostly to prove himself as a good figure to mikey. A war hero he thought, but as Gerard turned his head what he saw broke him more than his words or dreams could ever say. Up till now death was just a game to Gerard, but now death seemed more real when it had mikey and was laughing in his face. When Gerard saw Mikey with the sparkle fading from his dark eyes and the failed attempt to stop the bleeding, is the same time that death became more than roses and a coffin.

        Gerard no longer cared who saw him cry; For whom he cared for more than this world had slipped through his fingers like sand slips through time.


-  Umm yeah i believe its set in ww2, its based off of some dreams i've been having lately. if u see any mistakes feel free to point them out. comments are love - nikki

Feb. 3rd, 2008

  • 7:36 PM
me
 

Open your eyes to what lies inside

            “mommy, how can I see what’s inside me when I only see the outside”

Find your strengths see what resides

Spread your wings to find you can soar

            “silly mommy only birdies can fly”

Chase your dreams, just to realize there’s more than you believed

Forget about the shadows and learn to love

            “what if they’re mean, if they hurted me do I still love them?”

Even at a weakness, never budge ,never let go

Kill them with kindness , even if you’re down

Love the weak , love the weary

The secrets of the heart are the ways to what you want

            But secrets aren’t nice”

Open your eyes to love

The greatest secret of all

            “… mommy, how is love a secret?”
  
-srry about the long time no c... nikki was on writters block and di was well... writting a paper for LA (i hate having split personalities, honestly its true) either way i was stumped or busy so if its good comments = love!!!- n.d.w

Jan. 26th, 2008

  • 8:41 AM
me
 
                Mikaila stood on a rooftop staring at orangey-gold sunset and the first snowflakes that were gently floating in the frigid night air. She gently brushed the snow from her hair as she thought about how her father would have loved to see this… the first snow.
                It had been nearly seven years since his disappearance and everyone had forgotten or thought he had died so they gave up on him. But Mikaila had vowed to never give up on the hope of her father’s return even though it seemed unlikely.
 


__________ 1st person___________________
 

      “OH CRAP, I’m gonna be lateeee and she’s gonna…WHAMM!”Cold wood had impacted against my skin and had sent tiny pieces of green paper everywhere.”OWWWW” I cried, wincing in pain as I got to my feet. As I stood I quickly scanned one of the many green flyers that were on the ground.
 
~Entrance Exams~
11/11 at noon
All are eligible
~Good Luck~
 
“All are eligible… I thought they didn’t let girls in the academy,” I muttered as I stuffed a flyer in my pocket. She looked up to see a young man maybe in his twenties towering above her.
“Well on special cases they do,” whispered the mysterious man as looked at the flyer in my hands. My gaze adverted to the flyer and then quickly back to his gaze.
“And those cases would be,” I asked hoping he’d go further. I began to wonder who this man was and why he was bothering to tell me all of this plus about a million more things too.
“one case would be when there aren’t enough ninja to protect the village or…,”he paused as if for dramatic effect,” two if the girl truly had talent.”
“Thank you very much sir, you have no idea how much it means,” I whispered as I turned to leave.
“Miss Kawaharu?... are you willing to make sacrifices for your dreams?” he asked. I turned quickly giving him a slightly quizzical look but nodding.
As I ran off I began to wonder, how did he know my name and how could this stranger possibly know about what I wanted more than anything? Who was this stranger?

 

  -mikaila was six in the prolouge *tries to picture a teethless mikaila.* so currently she is thirteen and quite prettyful says my friend lauren *i am also an ok artist, i an draw past the point of stick figures* but anyway comments are love!!!!- di 

-

Jan. 19th, 2008

  • 10:15 AM
me
 

My life is a tragedy

It’s a story no one wants to hear

No one watches me as I cry endless tears

No one has cared since I was young

Might I find my therapy in this loaded gun

Just this barrel and 12 unlucky bullets

One click of the trigger

My fate goes with it

My eyes might not have been black or blue

But red is now the COLOR I am for you

Let this butterfly carry me away

Like the sun shines its rays

End this tragedy

Unloved, not today

- today i shall b di, considering today seems like a good day but if it gets horrible my alter ego shall save the day...... -
Di

Jan. 14th, 2008

  • 6:51 PM
me
 

Separation(the life of prostitution)
Pain

You’ve put me thru

Wishing I’ve never met you

Holding me

Pretending you love me

Just to hide that I’m another nameless face

we have no feelings

nothing considered love

only lust and the trail of hurt left in our minds

 

Watching

Tears roll down your face

Like a distant city battling a monsoon

 hearing faint footsteps

At a un-even pace

Never ceasing and at this moment

You remind me of something

I once knew

 

Asleep

With the a warmth of a body

Next to me

 Standing out in this starry night

Abandoning ourselves

Do you remember my nameless face

Just a person in your path

Just me

 

 

Faces

A different one every night

  Just to have someone hold me close and tight

It doesn’t matter who or when

‘cause the next sleepless night

I’ll start right over again

Don’t waste your time crying over me

it’s not worth your time

 I did it to be free

I’m not worth your time

Cause a prostitute is the only thing I’ll ever be

From the loneliness of my heart

Never to be loved

Not by you, not by me

Jan. 9th, 2008

  • 10:42 PM
me
  I wasn't much of anything 
    Because i was only pretending 
          to be everything i am

Jan. 9th, 2008

  • 10:37 PM
me
 

Pain

You’ve put me thru

Wishing I’ve never met you

Holding me in your arms

I’m leaving

 

Watching

Tears roll down your face

Distant footsteps

You remind me of something

I once knew

 

Asleep

Without a warmth next to me

Do You remember

Another nameless face

Were You Sober?

Was I clean?

Were you truly crying over me

Just a person In your past

a Suicidal teenage lass

Tags:

Jan. 2nd, 2008

  • 1:16 PM
me
 

Winter

A white wonderland

Blanketed thick

Hiding the earth

While the world slumbers away

 

I wander this white beauty

Forgetting myself along the path

Leaving only my footprints

To find myself, on the way back

 

These wondrous woods

Once the fairest white

Has melted to spring

Just like my heart

Possibly, I’ve found myself once again

Tags:

Dec. 25th, 2007

  • 10:31 PM
me
 

Hollow

On the outside she cries

For the emptiness she holds inside

And the love she never got

A space in her life she never filled was her heart

 

Grief was the plague that carried him away

His smile remains plastered in her memories

And as she weeps

The world leaves her behind

Especially when what means the most

is forgotten like an old photograph

 

When she notices

That she as well has nothing left to live for

She gently seems to fade with time

Like loved ones before her

She is one among many

 

Whose pain wells deeply

And their souls are hollow and unreal

Slowly fading with time

No one seems to notice the outcasts

Who are gently forgotten

 

But these days and memories

That may cause you to stay

Are some-what sad and disturbing

But they are the things that keep us strong

Until the day that we finally escape

And fade away

 - the 2nd part to widow

 

 

 

Dec. 25th, 2007

  • 8:45 PM
me
 Widow
 lips of poision 
heart of stone
eyes that could melt
a vibe so cold
from what left her behind and alone

Jagged fingers, sharp enough to kill
a body that it's own brand of heroin
a smile that can charm the dead
still  sits by a tombstone
always mourning

the women snicker and stare
at her thinning form 
her beauty hides the truth inside
the dead soul in her chest
is the only thing that keeps her alive

grime on her windows
decayed flowers by the bed
crying as she kills her pain
for no one else will do
suicide is the only way out
the widow

Tags:

Dec. 21st, 2007

  • 2:11 PM
me

life is MESSED up
i mean if someones not afraid of me they either hate me or find some way to hurt me,,,,
OH AN VIKI if u read this fing call me cause ur line is busy and u need 2 come over......ASAP aka NOW
i gotta tell u what the devil spawn wants to do at her v-day party.... *runs to hide danny and will in a closet*

Dec. 19th, 2007

  • 5:48 PM
me
 

Superficial Holidays

At Christmas

People talk about religion more than ever

Something that hides in our hearts forever

Yet people are so artificial about it

Talking about how a baby

Was born to die

And that’s why people say

They’re going to heaven

And hell is a place for two faced liars and people in jail

When really their no better themselves

Why don’t we focus on how he lived?

People simply don’t want to listen

Or don’t find it important

But while he lived he did miraculous things

Healing the blind, helping the children

Betrayed by one of his own followers

One of his friends you could say

Not kings or nobles

But peasants and sinners

The only ones who accepted him

And he died from betrayal

With a roar from heaven

To save those who will believe

Those who choose

The child named Jesus

Had more of purpose than dying for us

But to show us how to live

For him

 

- im not sure if its that great, and i havent posted in a while due to finals... yes i am christan so dont hate me cause of it... but comments r nice - lurve di